You take care of everyone else..but who’s taking care of you?

When we get on an airplane we receive safety instructions. Among them are the instructions of what to do with a child in case it becomes necessary to use the oxygen masks. Very clearly the instructions state that we put on our mask first, then help our child put on theirs. The obvious reason is that if we assist our child or children first we may pass out before we get ours on then we are no help to anyone, especially our child; whereas if we put on our mask first we will be capable of assisting and protecting our child and others around us.

So do you put on your oxygen mask first in day to day life or are you like most people who run around taking care of everyone and everything else while you barely have energy, let alone peace?
I know, I think we’ve all been guilty of it. Filling everyone else’s proverbial bucket when in reality our bucket has very little in it. So this is not about guilt or accusation, this is about asking ourselves the question, “Is it working?”
Seriously. Sometimes in life we are so sure that it’s just the way it is, it’s what everyone does or what is expected of us that we fail to actually stop and ask ourselves is what we are doing working? Are we getting the desired result?
In an airplane emergency our obvious desired result is the safety and well being of our children and ourselves and the way to achieve that is to put on our oxygen mask first!
Think for a moment, if you will, what you hope for in life. What are your hopes and dreams? If you do have children what kinds of lives do you want them to grow up to have? Joy? Love? Stability? Happy marriages, close relationships, financial success, health? So whatever you dream of for them, are you living it? Are you showing them how? Are you modeling those things for them? And about your dreams? Is your reality close or are you at least moving toward them?
Let me ask it this way, would you want your child to grow up and feel like you do everyday? Stressed, frazzled, alone, maybe even worthless? Running, like the energizer bunny to meet everyone’s needs and make everything perfect for everyone?
The answer is in the oxygen mask. Ironically we all somehow got the message that if we’ll do and be what everyone else needs then we’ll be happy. We’ll feel fulfilled and important. They’ll feel loved. So it is working for you? I know it wasn’t working for me and it isn’t working for the women I mentor.
So what does work? How do we find peace and joy and show our loved ones how to also? We put on our oxygen mask first. We stop trying to find fulfillment and worth outside ourselves. It’s only inside us and in my experience it begins with a deeper connection with God. Learning who He says we are.
Think of Christ’s example. He took care of more needs and people than anyone else who ever lived. And yet was He stressed and frazzled and overwhelmed? No. He showed us the key. He put on His oxygen mask first. He had absolute clarity about who He was; He took time to connect with His Father; He was filled and strong, then He went out to serve.
There are specific principles to living with peace and joy, to being full of love and sharing it, to thriving rather than surviving. I know because I’ve done it myself, I’ve tried both ways of being. I also mentor women everyday in learning how to put on their oxygen masks first. So often we focus on the kids, or the finances or the marriage and they don’t get fixed. But if we’ll do all things in wisdom and order, if we’ll focus on being whole ourselves, our relationship with God, healing our insecurities and fears, learning to discipline and properly guide our thoughts, discovering our personal power, learning and applying the principles of peace, joy and connection that is when our entire lives change for the better. That is when our dreams come true, our marriages heal, our children flock to us in love and laughter, our finances and health improve. There are simple laws of nature and when we discover and apply them we are happy, connected, and we become who we were born to be.
“Men are that they might have joy”…not someday if you work hard enough and are lucky… NOW.

Make sure you get more tips like this one in my weekly Living Joyfully Tips email! CLICK HERE

Related posts